tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-91821111355034861722024-02-18T21:51:09.563-08:00Sparklecat's Alaska Home ... Oh, and Writing TooA couple of crazy Californians have made a dramatic life change... They've moved to Alaska! And even worse - one of them is a writer!Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.comBlogger240125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-12759030464483954982015-04-30T10:35:00.000-07:002015-04-30T10:35:19.352-07:0039 Weeks, Loss of a Publisher, aaaaaand ...... whatever else may pop into my mind as I write this.<br />
<br />
This is the last day of April. Tomorrow we enter the month that seemed so far away when I first found out I was pregnant. Tomorrow I will be 39 weeks along, one week away from Wyatt's estimated due date. I will be nine days from my 39th birthday, which is also Mother's Day this year.<br />
<br />
This is the most significant May of my entire life. When I think about it, I'm sure my face must take on an expression akin to being stoned out of my gourd.<br />
<br />
This has been a surprisingly smooth pregnancy. I maintained my medical status of "boring" throughout, nothing strange, nothing out of the ordinary, nothing to cause excessive worry. (I say excessive because mothers will always worry about everything all the time no matter what.)<br />
<br />
There was the two weeks of nausea, food aversions, acute smells, and fatigue around week 8. Then the constant pressure on my bladder and the pubic symphysis issues started, the only things to occur consistently. (I did not get the second trimester respite from the bladder issues that many get.) A few weeks ago, I got the pregnant itchies, occasional rashes that would sprout, last an hour, then go away.<br />
<br />
I had a two-day bout of edema in my feet and ankles, which went away, but has returned with a vengeance the last couple of days, thanks to Wyatt's low head-down position in my pelvis. I have been referring to them as "Hobbit feet," and it is definitely the oddest thing I have witnessed in my body. However, I have not needed to resort to getting larger shoes or schlepping around in flip-flops, which I hate. My feet have always been long and skinny (think Disney's Ichabod Crane cartoon), so I've always had room in my shoes for width. I just keep my sneakers double tied with enough room to slip my feet into them.<br />
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I have exercised all nine months. Not anywhere near what I was doing as a fitness instructor beforehand, of course. Maybe three or four days a week at the most, sometimes going several days without because of physical issues or time issues. My routines have modified and shrunk. When I go walking with hubby and the dogs, our jaunts are shorter and I walk much slower now. I feel like I'm swinging my legs around Wyatt's head with every step.<br />
<br />
I have forgotten what it is like not to feel like I need a bathroom all the time.<br />
<br />
I expected to get wider as I gained weight. However, my belly has been growing steadily forward and not out to the sides. Even one of the midwives exclaimed how I was all belly and nothing else when I laid down for positioning.<br />
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Wyatt has been in ROA position for at least a couple of months. The midwives tell me that having his spine on the left would be better, so I have spent part of every day on my hands and knees, sometimes more like Child's Pose, to encourage him to spin. No luck yet, but he might chose to swing at the very last second.<br />
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He is still pretty active, but I thinking it's harder for him to move now, so he gets tired easier. I love watching my husband's face as he feels Wyatt's movement.<br />
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I have not gotten any of the insane pregnancy cravings that everyone talks about. Any cravings I have had are normal cravings that I've had ever since going Paleo, for the stuff that I once loved to eat but hated the way they made me feel afterward: fast food, doughnuts, candy bars, etc. I have occasionally had a box of cereal, Annie's White Cheddar Bunnies (which will accompany me to the birthing), potato chips, ice cream.<br />
<br />
I did allow myself whatever I wanted at my baby shower. No way was I missing out on that cake.<br />
<br />
But everything that I indulged in was the best that I could find, with the healthiest ingredients available. Everything was organic when possible, natural with simple known ingredients when not. For example, I made my own hot chocolate from organic whole milk, organic maple syrup, organic vanilla, and 100% cacao powder. I have never had a moment of crazy, uncontrollable desire or the need for strange foods that I would never have otherwise eaten.<br />
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I mention this because food is such a huge issue for many people. I get the impression that some people felt bad about themselves when they would see how healthy I was eating all the time. But I really do think that by feeding myself and my baby the way I did, my body did not want for anything. I have gained thirty pounds almost exactly. It looks like it's all in my belly (and my ankles these days.) I feel good most of the time and usually have a good amount of energy every day.<br />
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I hope maybe telling about my experiences will help other moms in their choices.<br />
<br />
I have not had the intense nesting or cleaning urge yet, but I do think I have procrastinated enough in getting the house set up. This week will be spent putting together the Pack n' Play, washing all the new cloth diapers and soakers and baby clothes, maybe canning up some stews for dinners, and cleaning the house for when the grandparents come to visit.<br />
<br />
Okay, I think I have exhausted the whole baby topic.<br />
<br />
And now for something completely different ...<br />
<br />
I recently found out that one of my publishers has decided to go out on a high note and close up shop. They have a couple of my stories, one stand alone and one in an anthology. I had just finished writing and editing a story for one of their anthologies for this year, but I didn't get to send it in.<br />
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It makes me sad when publishers go out of business. I feel like I'm being pushed toward self-publishing more and more nowadays. It makes me wonder what will happen in the publishing industry in the next five years.<br />
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This year I've decided to push a little harder and submit my stories to pro and semi-pro paying markets. I'm also sending queries to magazines, like travel and special interest magazines rather than fiction mags. It will be interesting to juggle these new ventures while I figure out being a first time mom at the same time.<br />
<br />
Well, I thought there might be other things to blog about, but I think this particular entry has gotten long enough. And I'm getting hungry, thanks to all that blather about food.<br />
<br />
And I need to make my tenth trip to the bathroom today.Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-21150301951857640342015-03-10T15:05:00.000-07:002015-03-10T15:05:03.729-07:00A New TSA Rant (plus Alaska Airlines praise)One of my dear friends ran into some very unfortunate circumstances a couple of weeks ago, right in time for her birthday. So I decided to give her the best present I could manage: my presence. (Written with a completely straight face and in all seriousness.)<br />
<br />
So I scheduled a last minute trip to Northern California last week to cram in as much time as I could with her, our friends, and my family. I got to bump baby bumps with my best friend who is about two and a half weeks behind me in her pregnancy and looks absolutely radiant. I got to reconnect with someone I hadn't seen in many years, got to play guitar with my dad, and had a Chinese food party with so many people I love. It was quite the whirlwind for a lady about thirty-one weeks along.<br />
<br />
The interesting part was the experience flying there and back.<br />
<br />
I have a lot of praise for Alaska Airlines. When I told the flight attendants I was seven and a half months pregnant, they were all very nice and offered me drinks and extra snack packets even before the cart went through. I was able to walk up and down the aisle whenever I needed. I'd also made sure I got the seat closest to the bathrooms in the back. As no one else was sitting with me, the attendants even encouraged me to put my feet up on the empty seats.<br />
<br />
When my first return flight to Seattle was delayed about four hours, I received a hotel voucher for the night, which was nice since I was prepared for a twelve-hour layover in SeaTac anyway. I had even bought a cheap air mattress and pump and knew exactly where I was going to sack out for the night. Didn't even need it.<br />
<br />
I got about five hours of sleep before having to brave the TSA security of SeaTac. I had no idea what to expect.<br />
<br />
My other experiences were the same as before: opted out of the scanner (they still tried to convince me to go through in Anchorage, insisting there were no X-rays to harm my baby in the scanner. There hasn't been enough research to prove the scanners truly harmless yet, X-rays or otherwise. Research that has been done has been paid for by the companies selling the machines.) Had the typical pat-down in Anchorage as well as Sacramento.<br />
<br />
Now here's where my disdain for TSA has grown even greater than before.<br />
<br />
In Anchorage on my way to California, I got the pat-down and saw one of the TSA agents going through my bag. I thought I had removed all the non-security-friendly items at home beforehand, but I had missed my Leatherman tool in a small side pocket. I sighed, thinking that I was going to lose it or have to mail it home.<br />
<br />
When my pat-down was finished, the agents discovered the machines for the test pads with which they wipe your bags for bomb chemicals had all gone down at once. I had to wait an extra ten or fifteen minutes while they called someone to get one running. During this time, the agent that gave me the pat-down noticed my Leatherman tool sitting on the counter next to my bag and asked if there was was something wrong with it. The agent searching my bag replied no, there were no blades in it.<br />
<br />
Now, there are several possible explanations here. One, perhaps she didn't want to give me any more hassle since I was pregnant and already waiting quite a while to be released thanks to the faulty machines. Two, perhaps she'd never seen a Leatherman before and only saw the pliers when she opened it, not the other tools inside the handles. Three, perhaps she never even opened the darn thing to check.<br />
<br />
She said it was fine. The tests came out fine and I was told I could go on my way, so I did.<br />
<br />
I did not do this on purpose to prove a point. This bag of mine was somewhat new and I had overlooked one of the smaller pockets when getting ready for my trip.<br />
<br />
But the fact remains that the TSA agents let a banned item through their security.<br />
<br />
What happened in SeaTac was even more interesting.<br />
<br />
I'm sure most have heard about the TSA Pre-check lines by now. You pay a fee and get a government background check that, when passed, allows you to go through the Pre-check line instead of the regular security line. It's just like the old days: no taking off shoes, no taking out laptops, and just going through the good old metal detector.<br />
<br />
When I got to SeaTac the morning after my hotel stay, a bunch of people including myself were being herded through the Pre-check line like cattle. I didn't realize it until I got my ticket and ID checked, and for a moment I thought I had gotten into the wrong line. But it was very busy that morning and there were two agents guiding masses of people into the Pre-check line. I went through without having to take off my shoes (very nice for a pregnant lady) or going through the pat-down for opting out of the scanner.<br />
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I pondered this as I waited for my flight to board.<br />
<br />
If I had been one of those that paid for Pre-check, I would have been very pissed off seeing all these people going through for free. So why were they doing it?<br />
<br />
I believe it was because the scanners are too slow for the busy periods. And when you include those evil people like me who opt out, it gets even slower.<br />
<br />
What's to stop a terrorist from planning to go through during those known busy times when people are pushed through Pre-check just to keep things moving smoothly? Is this something that happens at all major airports? If the body scanners and the pat downs are so effective, why are they so easily tossed aside when things get busy? How long would it have taken to get through security if they hadn't done that? If my Leatherman tool could be missed when things are slow, what could be missed when things are hectic?<br />
<br />
I choose not to do Pre-check because I only fly at the most once a year. And I plan on not doing that as often as I can get away with. I believe that it is unconstitutional to force me through pat downs, through body scanners that are unknown health dangers and often give false positives and negatives, and to force background checks on a law-abiding citizen without a warrant. This all tromps on my right to freely travel about my country.<br />
<br />
If they will send people through the old fashioned security measures en masse at busy periods, then why is all the rest of it even considered remotely necessary?<br />
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The more I see, the more I wonder why so many people just accept what they are told and go along like sheep with such ridiculous charades. I weep for our nation and pray that those who chose to be blind will one day open their eyes.Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-37261826900571402312015-02-19T15:05:00.001-08:002015-02-19T15:05:49.658-08:00The Third Trimester!I am twenty-nine weeks today, a week into the third trimester. I'm getting more tired and my exercise routines are gradually shrinking as the list of exercises available to me dwindles. I can see why it is so difficult to work out when you are carrying extra weight. I've only gained fifteen pounds as expected with pregnancy and boy howdy, can I feel it!<br />
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But I continue marching on, trying to get at least some sort of exercise each day, even if it is only parking at the back of the store lot and walking (slowly, to make sure I don't lose my balance and slip on the ice.) I continue to eat as healthy as I can, though I still dream of doughnuts after all this time.<br />
<br />
I did the gestational diabetes test and had no adverse affects from it. I expected my heart to race, but perhaps the exercise I did that afternoon and the protein that I ate for lunch helped my body process it quickly. My baby did not seem to be affected by it either, but he is such an active little boy to begin with. :)<br />
<br />
My lab report came back within normal limits, and I can't express how relieved I was to hear I didn't have to do the three-hour test, nor did I have to worry about declining and having to test my blood sugar all the time. So it ended up being a good choice for me, especially since they had a version without the red food dye in it. No migraines, very helpful.<br />
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The weather here has been fairly abnormal, though if you were to ask fifty Alaskans what normal weather is here, you'd get fifty different answers. But even with that knowledge, the fact that it has snowed once a month since the winter season started is very odd. And then that snow gets melted away or blown away. People are taking photos of their bare lawns and temperature gauges showing forty degrees or more. And then we watch the national news and see southern states getting buried up to their ears in snow and ice, frozen stiff with negative temperatures. Oh, so that's where our winter went.<br />
<br />
Yesterday was one of the warmer days, and very sunny to boot. It was the day I felt the shift from winter towards spring. I feel that shift every year, but it seemed pretty early this year. I think it usually happens in March. I actually went out without a scarf and hat, without warming up my car, without feeling like I immediately wanted to go back inside the warm house. I have my homemade organic hot chocolate and have to turn off the house heater before it's halfway consumed.<br />
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I have some interesting prospects developing in my writing career, including the possibility of a regular gig writing for a local magazine. I sent in some examples of my writing today in hopes that they like it. I have also received a couple of rejections, but I have set my sights higher this year, concentrating on professional-paying markets first, so that is to be expected.<br />
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I am working on a submission to a fairytale anthology as well as possible articles for the local magazine. I plan on returning to the complete rewrite of my novel after the fairytale is finished and sent off. I continue to exchange handwritten letters with my closest friends in other states, as it seems to oil the gears of my writing machinery.<br />
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I look forward to getting out and about with my husband and our baby boy this summer. Hubby has been interacting with the little one in my belly. Yesterday he patted the area where his feet and bottom have been hanging out and got a whole bunch of kicks and wiggles in response. I pretended to glare at him and said, "You woke him up." But inside I was smiling and oh, so happy to see the joy on my hubby's face.<br />
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I am loving this year so far. I pray that the stupid amounts of happiness I have been feeling spreads to as many people as I can touch.<br />
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Okay, done with the sappiness. On with the adventures!Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-2174455689097929632015-01-21T20:00:00.000-08:002015-01-21T20:00:12.725-08:00We've Got a Wild One, Folks!My growing child has been a very active little bugger. Instead of a few random pokes, I feel like arms and legs are flailing in all directions! Kickboxing classes seem to be taking place in my womb as I'm trying to go to sleep at night!<br />
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We're seeing the movements even through my clothes now. It's very distracting when we're sitting and watching movies, and my belly gives this great jerk to the side. We often have to rewind (does anyone say that anymore?) the movie because we lost about ten minutes to watching the baby's activities and trying to guess which way he's facing.<br />
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Just had an appointment where heart rate and measurements are still right on track. I get to do the gestational diabetes glucose test next appointment in three weeks. Oh, joy. I was even told not to be surprised if I flunk the first one; I have so little sugar and carbs in my diet now to begin with, my body may freak out and not even know what to do with the drink when the day arrives. "What IS all this crap?!"<br />
<br />
It amuses me to think what adjustments would have to be made if the tests DID show gestational diabetes. I guess my apple juice will have to go. Other than that, I have no idea what we could possibly change. No fruit?<br />
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I have recently fallen in love (again) with my calligraphy dip pen, even bought some parchment and a few extra colors of ink to play with. (I will never buy pearlized ink colors ever again though. They are way too difficult to remove from my pen while cleaning it.) I've been writing letters on adorable stationery with matching envelopes that I get from the Internet. I'm hoping a few of the recipients will write back in the same old fashioned way.<br />
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This sudden interest in letter writing and generally supporting the post office is pretty easy to understand: my frustration with social media continues to grow. A lot of people make great fanfare about whittling down their friends list, and that ever popular post, "If you're seeing this, you made the cut!" has been making an appearance on my newsfeed with alarming regularity. I notice this because I am pretty selective about accepting friend requests to begin with. I've stopped playing Facebook games. If I don't know a person or see/converse with them on a regular basis (or did at some point in time, even if we don't currently), I usually won't accept. I made it pretty hard to find me on Facebook in the first place, so I don't get random requests from strangers anyway.<br />
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At the beginning of this year, I did go through my friends list and unfriend those who hadn't been on Facebook in a very long time, or rarely posted at all. (I imagine a couple of them had probably unfriended me when their lives took an entirely new direction.) There weren't very many of those.<br />
<br />
But today, for the first time, I unfriended someone for a very different reason. This person often posts inflammatory memes and articles, always negative in content, as well as disturbingly graphic and violent. Rarely were the posts ever about life or activities in general.<br />
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It made me sad to click "Unfriend." I'm all about being free to post what you want. I understand that the posts were very important to this person, that they were about life missions this person has, that there is great hope change will come about with the sharing of these memes and whatnot.<br />
<br />
I've been told that a friend or two thought about unfriending me because of all the pictures of adoptable cats from the local rescues I share. But they hadn't because I post funny things and life updates as well, not just cats. And I guess that's my issue too.<br />
<br />
When I find myself wanting to hide almost every single post a person makes on Facebook, it's probably time to unfriend. The constant negativity was turning me off to the message of the poster. That internal sigh was turning into a hurricane wind.<br />
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I also find it rather pointless. Unless you are friending a ton of strangers because of business, fame/celebrity, promotion, what have you (and you have a very loose handling on privacy settings), you are most likely posting to friends who already share your beliefs. Preaching to the choir. And if you have differing opinions, the likelihood of changing those opinions through a Facebook meme is next to zero. Do it excessively, and you are likely to drive people away from the message instead.<br />
<br />
Sometimes people know how to debate, bringing up countering points without the intent to change minds. But most people only know how to argue and fight, sling insults, devolve to a verbal brawl without intellect or facts. Even when the initial post wasn't an invitation to debate or a plea for advice and opinions, many are still quick to put their dukes up and goad others into their battles.<br />
<br />
One phrase that makes me groan: "I don't really want to get into this here, BUT - "<br />
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Then don't. Just don't. Please.Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-36310734778850974462014-12-28T18:42:00.000-08:002014-12-28T18:42:00.833-08:0019 Week UltrasoundI am now about halfway through week 21, over the halfway-to-actual-baby hump, and about the middle of the second trimester. Things are getting a little more real all the time, and also getting a little more scary. A good scary.<br />
<br />
A day before officially hitting 19 weeks, hubby and I went in for the fetal assessment ultrasound. This is the one where they do all the measuring and check the baby from all angles to make sure everything is moving along as it should. This is also where most people find out the gender, which we already knew from the Panorama test. Still, it was nice to have visual confirmation. Our little Cinnabon was quite cooperative.<br />
<br />
The technician was very friendly and chatty, telling us everything she was measuring, and marking some of the pictures with funny phrases, like "Flexin'" when it looked like Cinnabon was flexing a bicep for the camera. We got lots of pictures, both in regular and 3D formats (which was a surprise).<br />
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I posted the ones that (I thought) did not have obvious clues to the baby's gender, as I was planning on a gender reveal at the baby shower. One of my friends is going to make a special cake for it. But apparently one or two people were able to tell from the photos, and posted their congratulations as such, so I ended up taking the whole thing down so as not to ruin the surprise.<br />
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This still doesn't stop people from making guesses when they see the picture of my 20-week baby bump. Alas, social media is not something to keep secrets on. This prompted me to switch gears and plan a small gender announcement photo shoot with a smaller cake, which will be happening next weekend, rather than the reveal at the baby shower. What with the constant requests for gender prior to purchasing or making gifts, and the fact that most of my family and friends in the lower 48 do not get to witness the glory that is my growing belly, I figured it was best that I succumb to the inevitable and get the gender announcement done soon.<br />
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However, there are two much more important things than the gender reveal issues: the baby is healthy and still measuring a day ahead of schedule, as was shown in the 10-week ultrasound, and I am extremely grateful for all the interest, well wishes, and desires to shower my baby with attention and gifts. I am a deeply thankful mom-to-be.<br />
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In other news, I utterly failed Nanowrimo again, but this was not a surprise in the least. I simply no longer want to write in the word-dumping fashion required to get a certain amount done in a certain amount of time. I end up hating it all and chucking the whole thing, regardless of whether it was a good idea or not. I am one of those people that needs the whole story planned out ahead of time (leaving it open to surprises along the way), and needs to be able to go back and fix the things that are not working before I get so deep in the hole I dug, I can't see to get out. Doing short stories has changed the way I do things so much, Nanowrimo is no longer conducive to getting things done for me.<br />
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I do it every year because I love the camaraderie, I love the memories of snow falling outside the windows as my fellow writers and I tap madly on our keyboards with cups of hot chocolate by our computers, I love trying out fresh, new ideas (if I have them in time for November). But I no longer worry about whether I make 50k by the end.<br />
<br />
Most years seem to have things that get in the way of crossing that Nano finish line as well. This year it was my participation in VPA's "The Story of the Velveteen Rabbit." The show opened the week of Thanksgiving and closed the weekend before Christmas. Even though I had a small part, it still sucked up a lot of my time and a good portion of the energy leftover from growing a baby. I had a lot of fun and frustration mixed up with this one. Granted, I normally wouldn't have agreed to this show, as it was a small part in a musical I wasn't familiar with, and half the cast was comprised of kids. Also, I don't like performing during the holidays, even though we don't have family here to celebrate with.<br />
<br />
But with the discovery of my pregnancy, I realized it was very likely this would be my last show in many years. If I waited for "South Pacific," I would find myself eight months pregnant, close to nine months, by the time the show opened. Not exactly a safe proposition. And I knew I'd be even more exhausted than I was for this show.<br />
<br />
I got to meet several newcomers to the theatre scene and help get them started on the path to local entertainment (with the warning that once the theatre has you, it doesn't let go easily, especially for guys!) I got sing to my baby every night, which I will continue to do each day. I got to see the evidence of my growing belly as my first act costume got tighter and tighter, and the waistline of the skirt rose toward my bust. (This in particular was a source of amusement for all us adults.)<br />
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Perhaps it wasn't the farewell performance I'd dreamed of. But maybe the child will catch the theatre bug someday and we'll make a debut together.<br />
<br />
And now the year is drawing to a close. I'm rapidly filling up a baby registry, which is taking up most of my time right now. I have to do a lot of research on things because there hasn't been a baby in the family since I was fourteen or fifteen years old, and I have never taken care of babies. I can count on one hand how many times I've even held a baby. So I read as much as I can (reading "You: Having a Baby" right now), exercise, eat right (always a struggle during the holidays), and ask a lot of opinions on Facebook.<br />
<br />
Around week 17, I started feeling the first popcorn pokes of my baby with the certainty that it wasn't just gas. I feel movement every single day now, getting stronger and stronger. The little Cinnabon is wiggling as I type this, for movement is most noticeable when I'm sitting still. I admit, as much as it delights me, it creeps me out a little too. It's just so strange and different!<br />
<br />
After the gender reveal photos are posted, I will post my registry as well and actively start planning for the baby shower that two of my theatre friends have generously offered to throw.<br />
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Thinking of all the theatre people that will be invited, I think this may go down as an epic shindig. ;)Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-2358177022899319672014-11-03T18:24:00.000-08:002014-11-03T18:24:16.326-08:00The Great, Fantabulous, Marvelicious Pregnancy Pet Peeve Rant!I was having a good laugh a little bit ago reading about the different pregnancy pet peeves that women develop during their nine-month "miracle time." A lot about criticizing name choices, breastfeeding opinions (opinions and advice about anything, really), comments on belly sizes, even choosing birthdays. ("Oh, you should have the baby on my birthday! Even though your due date is three weeks ahead of that!")<br />
<br />
I've had a serious rant cooking in my brain for several weeks. Actually, ever since I announced that I am pregnant with my first child.<br />
<br />
So let me begin this epic RANT with the following caveats:<br />
<br />
I am not a doctor or medical professional. Before you do anything, always check with your doc. I do, however, have a Bachelors in Kinesiology and a Masters in Sport Performance, a third degree black belt in karate, and multiple certifications in Group Fitness Instruction. I do not believe one study is the end-all-be-all answer to any health question, especially since money can make research tell you whatever it pays for these days. I try to do as much research as I can manage on a topic before spouting my opinion in such a public way, but admittedly, my research is largely limited to the internet, which is not always reliable. I do glean a lot, though, from my background in schooling, as well as my certification publications, such as ACE's magazine.<br />
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Some of my closest and dearest friends have been known to commit the "atrocities" I am about to annihilate. I in no way want to make them feel bad for the things they have said to me, but I do want to explain in detail <i>why</i> this gets me so hot under the collar. I am a first time mom-to-be, and I do not have loads of experience with children, most seriously lacking in time spent with infants. I <i>want </i>opinions, I <i>want</i> advice, and I want people to understand when I decide<i> not</i> to take their advice. I also want people to know why I might get snappy about this subject, when I generally try to be an un-snappy person. Please remember as you read on that everyone has opinions and these are merely mine. I'm fine if you disagree, I'm just begging you not to make it personal, or make a mountain out of a molehill.<br />
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So if I'm so worried about other people disagreeing with me, why am I bothering with this rant?<br />
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Because this is an issue that I think is extremely important. Because this issue reaches deep into every human being, male or female, and many struggle with it day in and day out, pregnant or not.<br />
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So here, my friends, begins my biggest pregnancy pet peeve rant. Prepare yourself, for it's going to be a long read.<br />
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<i>If I hear one more person say, "If you're craving something, you should just go ahead and eat it because your baby needs it," I'm going to -- </i><br />
<i><br /></i>
(Okay, I still haven't figured out what I'm going to do. I don't want to be violent, and there's many arguments that I'm already crazy, so ... )<br />
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A while ago, I posted on Facebook that I was seriously craving McDonald's Chicken McNuggets, and it was too bad I am aware of how horrible they are for the body. This was a random lament, not one I expected to spark such a huge reaction in me.<br />
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Every single person who commented on that post said the same thing: "Eat the nuggets."<br />
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There were variations on that, of course, but the message was the same.<br />
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(Again, if you are one of my beloved friends who made one of those comments, please understand that I'm not angry or trying to hurt you. I just want everyone to see where this rant is coming from, and why it's so important to me.)<br />
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I get it. Fast food and junk food is a big part of society's vast array of edible choices. It's not harmful if it's eaten every once in a while, not as a main staple.<br />
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The problem is, most of us have our heads in the sand when it comes to the reality check of "How much are you really eating?"<br />
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Sugar is <i>everywhere</i>. It's being put in everything, in various forms. And it is highly addicting. I myself am a serious junk food addict. And that's where the problem lies.<br />
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People say they can control how much junk they eat, but are they really?<br />
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I don't want to get in the great diet debate. I mean, like Paleo vs Vegetarian vs Vegan vs Wheat vs Dairy, etc. That's a debate that will never die and will always have hard core backers that swear this diet or that diet works for them.<br />
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But I think we can all agree that there is too much sugar in most of our store-bought items, too many chemical ingredients in prepackaged food. I think we can also agree that fast food restaurants are not in business for our health. They are in business to make money. Their food is addicting to keep us coming back for more, even knowing how unhealthy most of it is. The only reason any fast food joints are offering "healthier" options is because of public backlash and people suing for making them fat.<br />
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Okay, got that out there. So what does this have to do with pregnancy cravings?<br />
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I have seen many forms of this opinion floating around: If you are craving something, that means your baby needs it.<br />
<br />
Now, I don't think I've hit that point yet where the crazy pregnant lady cravings are supposed to happen. I'm not quite fourteen weeks along at this point. As mentioned in my last post, I have had the aversions, the nausea, and the superpower sense of smell. Most of those have now gone by the wayside. (I'm still waiting for the trips to the bathroom to lessen, but I think I should give up on that ship.)<br />
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I've had cravings most of my life, stemming from my teenage years when I ate bags of candy in one sitting and had fast food every week. Since my mid-twenties, though, I decided I didn't like the aftereffects of such binges. I decided it wasn't worth the crashes after the sugar high, the racing heart, the jittery shakes, the queasy tummy. I stopped buying candy, doughnuts, and Mickey D's. I asked my mother to stop sending me bags of candy on holidays. Husband and I wanted to try going Paleo, and took a year to eat up all the pasta, cereals, and other grains we'd stored. We still have brown rice and dairy, so we're not exclusively Paleo, but we're eating a lot more fruits, nuts, and veggies than we did before. Our eating habits have significantly improved, and so has our general health and well being.<br />
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When I had my first trimester nausea and food aversions, I became so desperate to find something that sounded good, something that my queasy tummy would accept. I turned to cereals and pastas during that time. But at least everything I chose I kept as organic and all natural and healthy as I possibly could.<br />
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Those Chicken McNuggets I was craving? Hubby went to Fred Meyer and got me a box of high quality, minimal ingredient, organic chicken nuggets that actually tasted much better than the fast food version. (Though admittedly, they were expensive as hell. I've only had that one box since then.)<br />
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Now, I realize I'm starting to sound preachy, maybe even holier-than-thou. That's not my intent. My intent is to lead by example, to walk the walk as well as talk the talk. My career has been all about helping people get on track to a healthier lifestyle, and sometimes that requires being the mean one, the raging bitch about important issues.<br />
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I know a lot of moms out there will be yelling about how there's no such thing as a bad craving, how if you're craving a certain food, it is because your baby needs something in it.<br />
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And those are the key words: <i>something in it</i>.<br />
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Most of us will be craving garbage all the time, because most of us have eaten garbage for so long and we like it. I know fast food is horrible, but if my husband, or mother or whoever, brought me a McDonald's double cheeseburger, twenty-piece nuggets, and large fries with a Sprite, I'd probably eat it because it smells so damn good. I am not perfect. (Did I mention I'm not perfect?)<br />
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But this statement infuriates me so much because so many women use it as a banner to cave in to whatever junk they want to eat, because "the baby needs it."<br />
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So if a mom-to-be told you she was craving dirt, laundry detergent, sand, or rocks, what would you say? "Go ahead and eat it because your baby needs it!"<br />
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Good lord, I pray not.<br />
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Most likely you would tell her that she is deficient in something and to seek medical assistance. According to this article (see link), it may be an iron deficiency, as many women get anemic while pregnant. But it may be the body is missing other vitamins and minerals too.<br />
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http://americanpregnancy.org/pregnancy-health/unusual-cravings-pica/<br />
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There are other sites that mention possible reasons behind other, more regular cravings and possible solutions to them (such as having sorbet or yogurt instead of ice cream).<br />
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So why is it okay to tell a woman that if she is craving junk food to go ahead and eat it? Wouldn't healthier substitutes be a better suggestion?<br />
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For example, when I have a major chocolate craving, my response is to make a Paleo chocolate mug cake. It is composed of organic cocoa powder, coconut flour, almond flour, an egg, coconut milk, real maple syrup, a little organic vanilla extract, and honey. I mix it up in a coffee mug and bake it. I believe this to be a much better option than most of the chocolate bar and candy options out there.<br />
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Or perhaps I'll buy a small container of organic chocolate ice cream with the fewest ingredients I can find and share it with my husband. Or maybe a bar of organic dark chocolate of at least 78% dark.<br />
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So many women struggle with diet, health, and body image in their regular lives, with so much tempting food out there that is bad for us. But I would hope and pray that during this time of all times, when a woman is growing a precious new life within her, that she would realize that this is the time to take charge. It's no longer just about her. It's about the little one inside her that has no control over the decisions mommy makes about her body.<br />
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One of my fears is that my child will be born with those cravings already in place. It has been documented that babies can taste what the mother eats during pregnancy through the amniotic fluid, and during breastfeeding through the milk. They develop likes and dislikes during that time. Babies can be born addicted to the drugs or the cigarettes the mother was smoking, and then they have to go through withdrawal after birth. I do not want my child to have the same health issues that some I love dearly have been dealing with their whole lives.<br />
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If we know these things about our babies, how can we just wave away the importance of what we eat while the child is developing?<br />
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It's hard, though. I know how incredibly hard it is, especially this time of year, with Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas all one right after the other. But we can make better choices, at least during this one time when our unborn children are residing within us. For example, when my child is born, I want to start a new Halloween function. Sort of a Trunk or Treat thing, where the treats are toys, books, or useful goodies instead of candy. Or if this is not possible, perhaps trading the candy for a larger toy the child has been wanting, and then disposing of that candy in some other fashion. (I heard there's a dentist in Anchorage who buys back children's Halloween candy after the holiday because he cares about kids' teeth. I want to meet this guy.)<br />
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For those who moan about junk food being okay in moderation, all I ask is that you take a real hard, definitive look at your diet and see if it really matches with your belief. Check the ingredients of packaged food that you buy at the store. My midwifery has their clients fill out a food diary for three days. I decided to do it for longer than that, and keep track of my diet as well as exercise. (Since I am no longer teaching at this time, I need the record so I know for sure I'm exercising as regularly as I think I am.) Sure enough, I was skipping more days of exercise than I was willing to admit to myself, even after my fatigue and nausea issues had vanished. Now I can fix that.<br />
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My biggest hope for this public post is that it will help other pregnant women make better choices for themselves and for their children. There is so much information out there about what pregnant women should and should not do, and much of it is conflicting. But I believe that healthy eating is one thing that a woman should not stint on or dither about. In improving her own life and health, she can also help those closest to her improve, such as spouses, family members, and friends.<br />
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You know, that whole "Physician, health thyself" thing.<br />
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Whew. That was quite a load off my chest (which has been getting heavier by the moment without such subjects weighing on it). Wink, wink, nudge, nudge. ;)<br />
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While I'm here, I will further demonstrate how I am not perfect: Every Saturday, I have a small Sierra Mist soda with my garden salad lunch and Sun Chips. On Halloween, I had my organic dark chocolate, but I did have a single York Peppermint Patty at a restaurant after my shrimp salad. At a Nanowrimo meeting last Saturday, I had a sugar cookie with icing and some Cranberry Sprite (after informing everyone to keep me away from the rest of the cookies, else they disappear.)<br />
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Also, if it is a choice between a less healthy food option and not eating at all because of nausea and vomiting, I understand how difficult it can be to make yourself eat when you're not hungry. So if it would otherwise mean starving yourself, then go ahead and eat something. But try your best to make it organic or all natural or some equivalent. The fewer ingredients on the list, the better.<br />
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At this point, all I can say is: Blessed be, lots of luck to you other mothers-to-be, and<br />
<br />
END RANTSparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-55175048042850954632014-10-17T20:46:00.001-07:002014-10-17T20:46:38.058-07:00Shall We Try This Again?So it's been a little while since my last blog post because on September 1st, I received my first, what the baby forums call, BFP (Big Fat Positive) pregnancy test. I did another one about a week later just because I was rather bored that day and wanted to see if it looked any different. It was such a strong positive, the pregnancy line pulled color from the negative line.<br />
<br />
I already knew I was pregnant long before I took the first test. I felt a shift which must have been conception day and I felt different thereafter. This pregnancy is so much stronger than the last one. I was extremely bloated during weeks four and five, I already couldn't fit my jeans. And my trips to the bathroom, previously frequent from my water intake as a fitness instructor, doubled.<br />
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And then week six hit. Extreme nausea, crazy food aversions, intense sense of smell, disappearing appetite, and insane amounts of fatigue.<br />
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While I was not doing the traditional praying to the porcelain gods, I was shocked with how different and how bad I felt. It was like having a horrible flu that wouldn't go away. I was used to being sick for only a few days and being able to sleep most of it off.<br />
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This didn't go away for two weeks.<br />
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I had to step off our rather rigid Paleo diet (no cereal, pasta, or bread in the house at all) just to find something that sounded edible. I got organic cereals, organic granola bars, canned ravioli and boxed mac and cheese, seed and nut bread. I ate organic sorbets and ice cream, and drank real ginger ale and sparkling fruit juices. The gas was tremendous, but the bubbles helped my irritable tummy. My midwife mentioned that carbs are easier to digest, and someone like me probably needed more carbs anyway. Carrots were the one veggie I was able to nibble on regularly.<br />
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I was amazed at how dramatically my digestion slowed. That is typical, but I had only just quit my teaching job in July (before learning I was pregnant), so I was still used to being hungry all the time. I have to nibble now, eat smaller meals or I get all blocked up.<br />
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By the eighth week, the nausea diminished and some of my energy started to creep back in. I still have to sit down during a round of dish washing, but I'm exercising more often once again.<br />
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And then I realized just how tired I got. My concentration had completely deserted me. I always thought I'd deal with the first trimester by writing and reading a lot during that time.<br />
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It didn't happen.<br />
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I'd sit down to write and end up just staring at the computer doing nothing. Not even surfing the net. I'd try to read a book and just end up reading the same paragraph over and over without understanding a single word. And even with all this, naps rarely happened. I started watching TV and DVDs with alarming frequency. My Facebook visits began to increase in short-attention-span-theatre style. I started referring to my baby as the Parasite because it felt like I was being drained from within.<br />
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I am so happy to report that I'm feeling almost "normal," my appetite is returning, and I have more energy to take the dogs for walks and do a few yoga routines at home. We had our first ultrasound at ten weeks (more on that later), and I am now heading towards the end of the first trimester at eleven weeks. I am now calling my baby our little Cinnabon in the oven. Gradually working back toward a Paleo-based diet, with a few cheats here and there. (Hello, flour tortillas.) I'm even in the Christmas show at the theatre this year, and I did a song for the annual fundraiser (gods, the cheesecake was heavenly.)<br />
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There is so much to write about, but I think I'll finish this entry with this: the end of my first trimester, and the associated nausea and fatigue, is perfectly timed for Nanowrimo next month. I can use it to get back on the writing track. I want to get back to Write 1 Sub 1 as well. I count my blessings that I am not one of those who will be sick through the whole nine months. I am grateful for my appetite and for my ability to exercise again.<br />
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Now I can only hope that my Nanowrimo idea is a good one. :)Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-63756577493547341972014-09-05T20:54:00.000-07:002014-09-05T20:54:16.587-07:00A Week of No FacebookWell, it's been about two weeks since I started that "No Facebook" experiment. I actually ended it the evening before the week was up because of a karaoke contest I was in at the Alaska State Fair. I wanted to post a video of my performance for my family and friends who wouldn't be able to see it otherwise. (Before you ask, no, I didn't even place. I don't really want to talk about it.)<br />
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I've been visiting Facebook the last week, even going so far as to load the apps on my phone and iPad again. Here was what I noticed:<br />
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I'm spending far less time on Facebook than I was before. And in some ways, I kind of feel bad about that. I'm getting on to post things about my own life, but not really spending much time seeing what's going on in others' lives like I want to. It's just too much. There are so many people I love and want to see on Facebook that it has become a giant time-suck I just don't have the energy to keep up with. So there are a few feelings of guilt tied in with it.<br />
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I got so much more productive when I got off Facebook. Getting things done around the house, cooking some new recipes, writing more, and so on. Yesterday I noticed that I was returning to my habit of checking Facebook on my iPad multiple times during the day (though not spending as much time on it as before). That was preventing me from doing things that needed to be get done, like dishes. (I hate, hate, hate doing dishes. Have I mentioned that before? So I always go for the distractions to get away from that sink.)<br />
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So I have once again deleted the apps from my phone and iPad.<br />
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I've been sending more text messages to the people I miss the most (the ones who have text messaging, that is. Yes, there are still people out there who don't have it and don't want it.)<br />
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So I still haven't deleted my account. And I'm not sure why I haven't. If I don't want to spend time on it, why bother keeping it? I guess it's to leave that one window open to those who use Facebook for communication and nothing else. Like those people who don't have text messaging in their phone plans. (Ahem, Mom?) ;)<br />
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And I imagine I'll probably want to use it for information mining as well, asking people about their experiences and reviews on places or products. I've found that to be very helpful this week in particular.<br />
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More on that later.Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-35815296472971103062014-08-23T23:41:00.000-07:002014-08-23T23:41:09.666-07:00The First Day of No FacebookSo, yeah, it's only the end of the first day and I'm already blogging again.<br />
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Facebook withdrawal?<br />
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Maaaaaaaaybeeeeee ...<br />
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I noticed something interesting today. While I was actually out and about for a big chunk of the day, I had several hours at home in the afternoon and evening. I started out doing some writing. After a bit, I noticed my brain shifting away, wanting to play an app game like Candy Crush, or hop on Facebook.<br />
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So I started learning a new song. I want to keep my soprano range in shape, so I chose "Glitter and Be Gay" from Candide. I remember seeing it years ago performed by a beautiful woman with a the richest soprano voice and the strongest jawline I'd ever seen on a female. Then I saw Kristin Chenoweth do it with even more humor looking like a little Dolly Parton in a big blonde wig, cute pink dress, and high heels that laced like ballet slippers.<br />
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This song is going to take some time. Talk about your vocal gymnastics. Whew!<br />
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When my mind started wandering toward app games and Facebook again, I started making a mini teddy bear. I designed a new pattern (I've made dozens and I'm still not satisfied with the results. I'll get there someday.) If I like the way this one turns out, I'll crochet a scarf and hat from the green qiviut yarn I got a while ago. I haven't used it because it is around $95 for a small skein of about 175 yards. Precious stuff.<br />
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Anyway, every time my mind would wander to Facebook and games, I'd direct it to some other project. For example, this blog post is happening because hubby is busy and I'm avoiding Facebook.<br />
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So here's my revelation:<br />
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I hadn't realized just how often I get on Facebook or play Facebook-related games on the iPad, or those time management games like Diner Dash on my laptop. It was my version of spacing out in front of the TV. I wasn't engaged, I wasn't thinking, I wasn't producing anything. I was just zoning.<br />
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And I was doing it <i>a lot!</i><br />
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Even when I stopped teaching at the club, I felt like I didn't have that much time to do stuff. The time I spent trying to read everyone's posts and see everyone's pictures, as well as making and sharing posts and pics of my own, was astronomical. The time spent playing games that I didn't really have to pay much attention to was almost as big. Even when I was "cutting back."<br />
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The desire to tune out is addicting. My drug was Facebook and app games instead of the television.<br />
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The television is actually more of a tool for me than Facebook. I use it to help me get motivated to do certain chores, like washing dishes. Yes, I really did say I use the TV for washing dishes. This seems like it would be a hinderance, but I usually put on musicals and sing along with the show tunes while soaping and rinsing. Otherwise, doing dishes is a hideously boring chore that has to be done, much to my dismay, every single day.<br />
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And no, I do not have an automatic dishwasher.<br />
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Only one day without Facebook, and I'm already so much more productive and feel better about things in general.<br />
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Don't get me wrong. I miss seeing my friends on there, chatting with people, seeing baby pictures and Throwback Thursday photos, sharing the posts of kitties needing adoption or fostering (Alaska has some uncommonly pretty cats!) While I knew some people were annoyed with my sharing of adoptable cats and kittens, the two times that friends of mine adopted one made it worth it. So worth it.<br />
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Nonetheless, I have the feeling I'm done with my personal Facebook account. I'm thinking of going back to Twitter for a bit, since I never spent very much time with it. Perhaps eventually I will start a professional author Facebook page.<br />
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Then again ... ;)Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-67321496166709988252014-08-22T12:22:00.002-07:002014-08-22T12:22:47.120-07:00The Break From FacebookI remember when I first started using Facebook. After the blingy-ness and teenager-ish feeling of MySpace, it seemed very plain and almost boring. It wasn't long before I was on Facebook exclusively.<br />
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I started playing games like Yoville and Family Feud. I collected more and more friends from theatre, from home, from high school.<br />
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And then I hit a turning point. I'm not sure why. I guess I just started noticing how much time I spent on Facebook and not doing all the things I love doing: reading, writing, singing, playing guitar, keeping my house clean. (Okay, I don't really love doing that last one, but I do love the results.)<br />
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As time has rolled by, I've limited my visits. The more news reports on how Facebook invades our privacy in the name of advertising and making money, the more I cut back on my Facebook time. I stopped keeping up with my newsfeed, even knowing there were things I wanted to see and wasn't. I stopped "liking" everything, especially when I learned that's how they gear their advertising to you specifically, and even control what you see.<br />
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I recently quit my job. Oh, did I forget to mention that? Yeah, I quit my job as a fitness instructor. Lots of reasons, a whole other post on its own. Let's just say we did it to cut back on expenses related to it, and to increase the amount of time I can spend with my family.<br />
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So you would think that with all this extra time on my hands, that I wouldn't worry about time spent on Facebook.<br />
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In reality, I find I have even less desire to be on Facebook than before I quit.<br />
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So I'm conducting an experiment. If you've ever tried to reduce the clutter in your house, you are probably familiar with the adage, "If you haven't used it for a year, get rid of it." Or to test this, you put the things in a box with the date on it. If you haven't opened that box within a year, donate it to a thrift store without even looking inside.<br />
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I'm giving up Facebook and all related apps for a week (stuff like Candy Crush, etc.) I'm encouraging friends to send me their email and home addresses because I want to start writing the old fashioned way. I really loved that old book series "Pen Pals" and want to bring that art back. I dusted off my address book that usually only makes appearances at Christmas. I plan on using Skype whenever possible as well.<br />
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I'm starting with a week, just to test the waters. If I don't miss it, I'll keep going. At some point, I'll probably decide to delete my account entirely.<br />
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My only stumbling block is that I love being able to see all that's going on in my friends' lives. I live thousands of miles away from many of them and Facebook has been the only reason I'm still in contact with some of them. Some have new babies, and I love watching their videos and seeing their pictures. Some do theatre, some go on thrilling adventures, some share my interests like writing. These are the reasons I was on Facebook to begin with and why I've stayed with it for so long. It's very convenient for this purpose.<br />
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So I'm not sure what to do about photos. I do love posting photos so my loved ones can see what we're up to. But I'm not at all familiar with websites that are photo-centered. Are there any out there that aren't just as bad as Facebook at violating our rights for the sake of selling us stuff?<br />
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On the upside, this may mean that I make more blog entries. :)Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-34797966701735847322014-07-27T12:29:00.000-07:002014-08-22T11:57:03.337-07:00The Alcan Adventure!About a year ago, Logan and I decided we wanted to get a truck and camper. Having two dogs that always go with us when we go out, it was a little difficult to find sitters for just the cats. That meant we usually didn't go out for longer than a day. There are several trips we've been wanting to make, like Valdez and Homer and Chena Hot Springs near Fairbanks. We did go to Chena Hot Springs last November for one night, since a friend of mine was willing to watch the cats, but Dexter wasn't too keen on that (he spent most of the time in hiding.) But that was a lot of driving in two days and not a lot of time relaxing or enjoying all the fun stuff there.<br />
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I remembered my aunt and uncle used to come visiting from their home in Washington to my family's home in California with a camper, their cats riding along inside it. So I asked my dad if he would be willing to sell his old camper to us, as he and Mum weren't going to be using it so much anymore. He was willing.<br />
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A crazy plan formed: I would drive down to Idaho and trade in my car for a truck at a huge dealership that has special deals for Alaskans and other out-of-state patrons. Then I would drive to Mum and Dad's house in California to pick up the camper, and drive it back through Canada to Alaska. I asked a few friends to see who would like to share the adventure with me.<br />
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See, I didn't think Dad would want to sell his truck. That was his baby and he'd had it for about fourteen years. But Dad surprised me one day by offering it to us with the camper for about 10k. This meant I wouldn't have to drive down, I only had to fly and drive back up.<br />
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We jumped on the offer and started saving up, planning on doing the drive and the deal this summer.<br />
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Over the course of the year, the plan evolved. Logan decided he needed a vacation, so he invited himself along. My friend Tiffany agreed to come along the drive back. Then my cousin Alex threw her hat into the ring, making us a party of four plus a small service dog, Chloe.<br />
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Then Logan's work interrupted, so he had to fly down about four days after me. He only got a couple of days with his family before we started the drive back. We were on a time crunch because the house sitter had her own vacation planned as soon as we got back, so we couldn't extend ours at all.<br />
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I spent a week in California with my family. Then, at about 3 in the morning on Sunday, June 15 (yes, it was Father's Day), we started the long trek back home.<br />
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We spent our first night at my aunt and uncle's house in Northern Washington. It was very rainy there, of course. I got to see my cousins, we toured their homes and properties, met their animals. I almost had a heart attack when Aunt Christy brought out one of their less friendly cats.<br />
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He was a dead ringer for Dusty. So alike, it was scary. My heart ached.<br />
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We left after the tour, around 11 in the morning. We rode the ferry (a major trip for equilibrium, to be sure) and crossed the Canadian border that day. We stopped at a nice RV park in Cache Creek, next to a stream. Tiffy and I shared the bed, Alex got the table that turned into a bed with the seats, and Logan sacked out in the truck.<br />
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Many areas along the trip were very nice with lots to look at and take pictures of. But some areas, like a long stretch after Dawson Creek, were very boring.<br />
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We got lots of pictures of bears and other wildlife. It go so that we'd say, "Oh, it's another bear. Keep going." We even got some video of a bison mock fight. They weren't really fighting all that hard, mostly stamping and lowering heads with an occasional bump of their noggins together. But pretty neat to see.<br />
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It was interesting to note that in all the larger cities, A&W was the one restaurant you could be guaranteed to find. There were so many of them! We finally tried a Tim Horton's in Whitehorse, since we passed a bunch of those too. Fast food that is a lot fancier and better tasting than fast food. Almost like a cafe at high speed. Would definitely recommend to anyone who hasn't tried one.<br />
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This was not an easy trip. Because we were under the gun to get back by the 20th, we didn't do much other than drive. We spent one night at Liard Hot Springs, which was great except for no showers or laundry. There were several construction areas. We only got stopped at one for about twenty minutes. The others were no problem because we were out past the work crew times.<br />
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Getting through the border was interesting. When we crossed to Canada, the lady asked for our passports, asked how we were all related, where we were going, if we had firewood and some other things, and then let us go. Very polite and rather cold.<br />
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The guard at the border crossing into Alaska was very friendly and chatty, gave us our passports back and needled three of us for not having signed them, then he and Logan started talking about knives before we went on through. It was such a relief to be back in the States, but I have to admit that I get a real kick out of Canadian money. So colorful and shiny, and who could not love a coin called a "looney?"<br />
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We stayed a night in Tok after some debate about whether we should push through for home or not. I wanted a shower and some clean laundry, and we had plans to stop at the glacier on the way home, so we found an RV park to stop. I will never wash laundry at an RV park ever again. Waaaaaaaay too freaking expensive and not worth it. There are even places that have coin-op showers, for crying out loud. If I'd known, I would have changed my vote.<br />
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We did hit up the glacier and the restaurant next to it. We had a couple of days before Alex had to fly home, so we went souvenir shopping, stopped at the Alaska Zoo, and even visited Whittier.<br />
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My friend Tiffy stayed with us for a week. I learned a very uncomfortable truth about our society while she stayed with us: there are people who don't understand service dogs. A Walmart employee in Canada yelled at us, "No dogs!" We said, "She's a service dog!" and continued on our way. Minutes later, a manager tracked us down to check her tags. At least she was polite and nice about it.<br />
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But when we tried to go indoor mini golfing at a place called Putters Wild in Anchorage, the lady behind the counter discouraged us from entering, saying the dog would likely soil the premises. She didn't actually say "no," probably because that would be illegal. You know that boss in "Office Space," the one with the coffee mug saying "Yeeeeeaaaah, if you could come in tomorrow, that would be greeeeeaaaat"? That kind of voice.<br />
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Neither of us are confrontational people. Looking back, we both wished we'd challenged her, asking if she was refusing entry. But in my mind, why would we want to spend money in a place that doesn't accept disabled veterans and their service dogs? So I said, "Let's go." And that's what we did.<br />
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I was surprised and dismayed that there are people like this. She probably assumed that it wasn't really a service dog, just someone trying to get away with taking her dog wherever she wanted. She didn't ask to see tags or documentation or anything. Just made us feel horrible for even setting foot in there with a dog.<br />
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So please, if you ever find yourself in Anchorage, please do not go to Putters Wild. They clearly don't support disabled veterans or service animals.<br />
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But other than those couple of down moments, the trip was amazing. I look forward to trying different legs of it each year when we go down to visit family.<br />
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My next post will be about the dip netting trip we just took a few days ago, and the cats first adventure away from home that didn't include a vet visit. ;)Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-80662649985644212672014-07-13T15:50:00.001-07:002014-07-13T15:51:06.387-07:00The Big Exciting (and Disappointing) NewsSo, once again it has been more than a month since my last post. But the month of June was quite jam packed. Before I get to that adventure, I promised I'd tell about something else that happened during the run of the Marvelous Wonderettes.<br />
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On March 17 I did a pregnancy test and it came out positive!<br />
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I knew I was really pregnant because my period is as regular as a stopped clock. I was two days late and feeling very strange down there. Went to my doctor for confirmation, bringing my husband and my calendar with my menstruation tracking on it. We both had lots of questions, as you could imagine. Our biggest worry is that the baby be healthy despite our "advanced" ages.<br />
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Anyway, she told me I was about five weeks and we set an appointment for some blood tests, which came back pretty normal for pregnancy.<br />
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My parents had no idea that we were even thinking about having a kid. And technically, we don't call it "trying." We call it "no longer preventing." If we have a kid, great. If not, we like our lives the way they are, too. I have no intention of doing fertility drugs, ovulation tests, timing sex, or any of that stuff a lot of people do when trying to conceive. It'll happen the natural old fashioned way or not.<br />
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So I decided to mail the positive pregnancy test to my parents as a "late" birthday present for my mum. (See what I did there? Hee hee hee.)<br />
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I got to see her reaction through Skype. Well, half her reaction. I could see one eye because she was too close to the camera. But that eye got huge all of a sudden.<br />
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The package arrived and surprised my parents on March 31. I guess I was around seven or maybe eight weeks by then. Since my parents got their gift, I decided to start telling people that I was expecting.<br />
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By the way, I did tell my fellow Marvelous Wonderettes before that day. I spilled the news during our limo ride in costume on the way to our opening night performance. My friend Sarah already knew, having deduced from something I said during one of the appearances we made prior, but I wanted all of them to know in case I started behaving weird, like not eating all the junk I'm known to love.<br />
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Anyway, the day after my parents found out was April Fools. I went to teach my Group Power class that morning. One of the participants said something to the effect of, "If I hear one more person say they're pregnant or engaged, I'm going to punch them!"<br />
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I laughed and said, "Yeah, I was going to announce that I'm pregnant, but I realized that if I told everyone today, no one would believe me."<br />
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The room went quiet as this sunk in. Alicia, one of my fellow instructors, said, "Hold it. Are you pregnant? For real? Are you just playing with us?"<br />
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I smiled and said, "Yes, I'm pregnant for real. No joke. I really am."<br />
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General pandemonium as people squealed and congratulated.<br />
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And then Mother Nature played her April Fool joke on me: that night I started miscarrying.<br />
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It was like a bloody floodgate opened. My doc scheduled another blood test and sure enough, my progesterone count had dropped. The lady who took my blood seemed sadder about it than I was. In fact, she was so sorrowful I almost started crying. But I realized that it wasn't my emotion making me that way, it was hers. So even though she said, "It's okay to cry," I did not.<br />
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It seemed crazy to me that, as people found out that I'd miscarried, their reactions were far more emotional and sad than my own. We live in an area that has many deeply religious folks, and I imagine that might have something to do with it. They considered it a life lost, as if I'd already had the baby.<br />
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I guess it didn't really bother me that much because I knew it was a distinct possibility. I'm thirty-eight years old, spent decades on the pill, and have never been pregnant before. If I didn't have a miscarriage first time out, I would have been shocked.<br />
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Also, seven weeks was hardly long enough to process the information. I hadn't been thinking of baby names or college funds, clothes or food, or anything. I hadn't really even considered whether it would be a boy or a girl. As soon as I knew for sure I was pregnant, suddenly I wasn't.<br />
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I trust my body. It has worked so well for me over the years I have no reason not to. And I trust whoever or whatever is in charge of running the Universe. If this is on my life's agenda, it will happen.<br />
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But it sure was strange, feeling like I needed to comfort other people when I was the one who had the miscarriage.<br />
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My doc prescribed me a medication, the name of which slips my mind now. A common one that goes inside the vagina and "finishes off" the miscarriage. I think mine was pretty close to done at that point because I didn't have all the horrors that other women have described using that stuff. If I hadn't known better, I would have thought it was just a really late, really heavy and clotted period that lasted more than a week.<br />
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And so now things are back to normal for my body. And life goes on as it always had.<br />
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There are a few changes on the near horizon, though. These changes would be beneficial if I got pregnant again. I'll be talking about those in a future post.<br />
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Next up: The Great Alcan Highway Adventure!Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-21894296084045522992014-05-12T15:12:00.000-07:002014-05-12T15:12:05.280-07:00Finally Stepping Off the Crazy Train: The Marvelous WonderettesIt has been about four and a half months since my last blog post. This is my first blog post of 2014, apparently. I didn't realize it until just a day ago when an old friend found me through this blog and I thought, "I wrote in January at least, right?"<br />
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Uh, no. And now it's the middle of May. Yikes.<br />
<br />
So I think I will be writing down the events in a few blog posts so they don't come off as one long winded, crazy-quilt, splatter mess of words. Which they might anyway, so who cares, right?<br />
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This blog post features the main car of the crazy train, the one I spent most of my time traveling in: The Marvelous Wonderettes.<br />
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I've been doing theatre since I was about seventeen years old. I remember making my high school choir teacher mad because I had to miss the Christmas concert due to being in "Jeanette Isabella," Theatre El Dorado's Christmas show that year. I'm surprised she didn't flunk me.<br />
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I was doing back-to-back shows during those younger years. Sometimes performing, then doing backstage stuff when I was too young for parts in other shows. I was a stage mangler, excuse me, manager, props mistress, stage hand, yadda yadda. I did everything. "Godspell" was probably the toughest show because we were on stage most of the time, but it was a cast of about nine or ten individuals. Sometimes you sang lead, sometimes you sang backup, sometimes you didn't sing at all. Sometimes you got to sit down and rest, there weren't any costume changes or scene changes (well, except for the odd costume pieces we put on while onstage). Not a lot of strange hair or makeup needed doing.<br />
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The Marvelous Wonderettes was so much more exhausting!<br />
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I hadn't done a show since March of last year, when I was asked to take a few vacated roles in "The Sting." I didn't have much hope in getting into the Wonderettes because there were only four parts, and the first act was the senior prom, which meant the four girls were around eighteen years old.<br />
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Everyone else was apparently sure I'd get in. I guess maybe I pass for younger than what I see in the mirror every day. I definitely know I have the energy of a teenager. And I still have the teenage skin problems as well. (Which they said would go away in my twenties. They LIED!)<br />
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I was shocked when I got the part of Missy. But it also made sense. She would be the one that seems a little older because she's the "director." She tells everyone what to do, where to go, what song is next, chastises the other girls for not doing things right, and so on.<br />
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The rehearsals started in mid-January. And it was like rolling a snowball down a hill: it got bigger and bigger and faster and faster.<br />
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I soon realized a few freaky facts.<br />
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One, there were only four of us carrying the entire show.<br />
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Two, there were no costume changes or scene changes of any kind, except during intermission. So no moments to go backstage and check in with the script or refresh lines. Or get a drink. (Except a quick swig of water from the tiny punch glasses on the prom refreshment table.) Or go to the restroom. (The stage "restrooms" weren't real.) In fact, my character never left the stage once she was on it.<br />
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Three, with the exception of one song (which was a solo of mine), all four of us performed in every single number of the show.<br />
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Four, it soon dawned on me that in the first act, my bossy character's lines usually led into each part of the scene.<br />
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This is the freaky fact that scared me the most. I realized that if I swapped my lines or skipped any of them, we could end up jumping ten pages of script or missing several songs.<br />
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Bring on the performance nightmares!<br />
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I don't think I got much sleep the month of March. Every time I called for a line during rehearsal was a tiny moment of terror.<br />
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And four part harmony is not easy when there is no one else sharing your part. You're trying to listen to each other and remember your own stuff as well. The "Mr. Sandman" we did in Treble Choir in high school was a cakewalk compared to the Wonderettes' "Mr. Sandman."<br />
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So all in all, this was a huge amount of work for four girls to take on. We also did a slew of appearances at different rotary club meetings, chambers of commerce, and what have you. Some in costume and some not.<br />
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We really didn't get any down time before the show or during intermission either. I personally had two hair pieces, a curly one for the first act (1958) and a big bump for the second act (1968). I had hairpieces because my fine hair would not have handled the teasing needed for the second act in particular. One girl had to have a tattoo drawn on her arm between acts, another had to get into a pregnant belly before changing costumes, we all had to change our makeup to match the time period. When we got to the theatre, it was go-go-go until the show was over.<br />
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And even with all that exhaustion, it was still fabulous amounts of fun.<br />
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People loved the show. They sang along, swayed back and forth, couples smiled at each other when they heard songs they recognized. We even had a few people come up and tell us they were Class of '58 for real!<br />
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Every night we would pick someone out in the audience to refer to as "Ms. McPherson." The audience got to vote for their prom queen every night. The real winner was fixed, but it was fun to see who won the audience over each night. I actually won once, which I never thought would happen because I was the one bossing the audience around and telling them to turn off their phones. Betty Jean got a lot of sympathy votes and won most nights.<br />
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We also would pull a man up on stage to be "Mr. Lee." My character had a crush on this teacher in the first act, and then "marries" him on stage during the second act. Luckily all our Mr. Lees were good sports and got a kick out of it. They were usually someone related to or known well by some member of our cast, crew, or band. And our own director was Mr. Lee for the final show and didn't even see it coming. Heeheehee.<br />
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One night a lady that we picked to be Ms. McPherson just didn't cooperate at all. I don't know if it was because she didn't want to stand out, didn't really understand what was going on, or maybe she was frozen in fear. I was worried we had ruined the show for her, but she said afterward that she enjoyed it. I hope that was true.<br />
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The show ran for four weekends. Several sicknesses made the rounds through all four of us, I had allergies on video night (and I cringe every time I hear my voice crack on that video), and we were all tired to the point of dragging. But the four of us went out karaoke-ing one night and pretended to get in a lot of trouble, taking pictures of us in handcuffs and what not.<br />
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We got lots of memorabilia from our director, like mugs and a picture book. Lots of M&Ms, veggies, and fruits were consumed during rehearsals. I made bears with matching lollipops for each of the girls in their individual colors, and gave chocolate moose pops to everyone else in the crew and band. We made a shadow box of memories for the director and made him cry (again.) The four of us got to ride in style to opening night in a limousine in costume, which was definitely a bonding moment when I spilled my big news (more on that in another post.)<br />
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It was a big, huge, amazing, marvelous experience that I am so proud to have been a part of. I made some new friends, got closer to those I was already friends with, and got to play a character almost twenty years my junior. I'm quite positive that's the last time I'll be a teenager on stage.<br />
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Now if only my teenage skin problems would go away ...Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-75228694793212252072013-12-30T17:46:00.000-08:002013-12-30T17:46:44.634-08:00Review of 2013: The Speediest Year YetTomorrow is the last day of 2013. Looking back at my blog, I realized that with this post, that makes four blog posts for the entire year.<br />
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I think this year zoomed by a lot faster than previous years. Like I've heard it said, once you're over the hill, you begin to pick up speed. ;)<br />
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All in all, it was a fairly mediocre year, but still a vast improvement over last year. The worst part is missing my fur babies, Dusty and Asuka. They've been gone a year now, and I'm still struggling with feelings of sadness and guilt, though I know we did everything we could. I occasionally make donations to some of the local cat rescues in their memory to help me deal. At least I can speak of good memories without automatically bursting into sobs now.<br />
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The highest point would be our adoption of Dexter (now full grown and goofier than ever), and his sweet and loving relationships with us and his best kitty pal Daisy. Other high points include more recent events, such as some achievements of my husband in his job, my performances with Cantora Arctica, and getting asked to sing in next month's production of "The Dixie Swim Club." I had a story accepted a few weeks ago, one that has been hanging in submission purgatory for a very long time. It will be my first reprint; it was the first story I ever had published.<br />
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My writing has been very poor, not really any better than last year. Again I only wrote about 1500 words for Nanowrimo (bad story idea that went absolutely nowhere and I didn't have the time or energy to try and rescue it, or start again.) I've hardly written anything for the last six months. I'm not sure why I struggle with it so much, but I have a hard time balancing the things I want to do with the things I have to do (and a lot of those things happen to be time and energy vampires, like practicing routines).<br />
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I have no resolutions, because they are always the same, which means it makes no difference if I start tomorrow or next month or next year. So if I really want to change certain things, I have to want it more than I do.<br />
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Some things to look forward to next year: we're trying the Mud Factor 5k obstacle run in June. Also we'll be purchasing a truck and camper from my parents, which will make vacationing much more fun and avoiding airport security possible. I'll be trying out for The Marvelous Wonderettes, but if I don't make it in the show, I'll join the Cantora Arctica choir again for their spring semester.<br />
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In the meantime, I'll be writing, playing guitar, maybe starting craft projects again. And spending less time wasting my brain on iPad games like Candy Crush Saga. (Why, oh, why did I ever start playing that time vampire of a game?!)<br />
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Wait, that almost sounded like New Year's resolutions after all ...<br />
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Happy New Year! Many blessings to you and yours!Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-40807234787498588232013-08-25T19:20:00.000-07:002013-08-25T19:20:55.375-07:00A Whole Lotta StuffIt has been four months since my last post. So much has been going on.<br />
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Our last winter snow occurred on May 17th this year, either tying or breaking a record for late season snow. The weather after that for two months was perfect and beautiful, even downright hot for a long time. Almost no rain at all. Even so, we only managed to get out in it a couple of times. We got a canoe and paddled the entire length of Eklutna Lake, a feat my arms will not soon forget. Carrying the canoe back up the hill to the car afterwards was a form of torture no creature ever deserves.<br />
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And then on August 1st, the rain started. It has rained most days this month. A couple of nights ago we had a big storm roll through with hail, thunder, and lightning. Dexter actually got a little freaked out by it.<br />
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Speaking of Dexter, he and Daisy are so close and cute together, the adorableness simply floods the house. They are often cuddled up and cleaning each other. They stopped sleeping with us when the weather got hot, but every once in while they like to sit next to us or curl up in our laps. Dexter is sleek and still fairly small, a face full of character and goofiness. He likes to eat dog fur fluffies and carpet fuzz from the kitty tree. He even threw up one of my hair ties. He adores his felt mousy toys. His tongue sticks out almost all the time.<br />
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It has been something of a trial with his bathroom habits. He seems to have decided that he doesn't like the self-cleaning litter boxes (a serious disappointment for me; I loved them, and they were expensive.) AND he doesn't like "World's Best Cat Litter," which truly is the best. So he has developed a habit of crapping on the floor near the boxes. I have to keep them clean by scooping several times a day, because he won't use one that has anything in it. It's a pain, but I'm figuring him out.<br />
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Recently I admitted to myself why I have avoided writing for the last four or five months: I'm still sort of depressed and definitely exhausted.<br />
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At night I still sometimes get sad and cry over the loss of my furbabies, Dusty and Asuka. And I still always question what happened. I've lost my faith and my confidence in many things that used to be part of my coping and support system, and have nothing to replace them. I've been spending all my spare time playing video games that I have played before. For a while I started making teddy bears again, but quit halfway through one.<br />
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I've gotten sick/injured a couple of times recently and I think it's because I'm teaching a lot and there's no one to substitute for me. So the exhaustion and depression combined to the point where I'm occasionally cleaning the house, but not really accomplishing anything.<br />
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I had my heart and hopes pinned on the theatre's production of "Brigadoon" getting me out of this cycle. They did not get nearly as many people as they needed at the auditions, and still I did not get the lead or the supporting female part. Even with the one actor that I counted on showing up to auditions, it didn't happen. He got cast as the father of the lead female role. I guess I've passed my prime age window for lead roles.<br />
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I know that I would have gotten in the show if I was willing to accept any role. I'm not willing. Especially for a show that's rehearsing all summer long. I was shocked to find one of my friends with a gorgeous voice was cast in the chorus as well. Everyone is always telling me what a wonderful voice I have, so if we can't get decent roles on account of our talent, I start to wonder why I try anymore.<br />
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So now I'm a little apprehensive of auditioning for the musical that is just four female roles. The problem is that they have to play an age range of eighteen to twenty-eight. The first act is senior year in high school, the second act is the ten year reunion. This can go one of two ways: the cast will be women all around my age who look young enough to pass as a group (thirties who still have a uniform youthful look), or the cast will be women who are actually in that age range. It can't be a mix, or the women who are older will look much older beside the younger ones.<br />
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The theatre situation has got me questioning if I really have any talent at all, if maybe I'm an old hag that everyone is trying to placate and humor. A lot of things I used to be sure about are questionable at best now.<br />
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Now I'm left battling my own desire to hide away and do nothing of worth. I tell myself I don't want to start a project because something is going to interrupt it (husband getting home, needing to practice routines, cleaning house, etc). I'm even reading books I've read before so I don't have to pay attention to them. I feel overwhelmed every time I start something, thinking about everything that needs to be done.<br />
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I'm floundering a bit, trying to find direction again. I went and sang at a karaoke contest where the finalists compete at the Alaska State Fair. I got second place and a finalist spot for the show this Friday, and I'm nervous. I have deep issues with contests like this, stemming from childhood school trauma. (I can hear you asking, "So why did you do it?" Simple answer: I love to sing.)<br />
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I'm even second guessing this entire post as I write it, reread it, write some more, delete stuff, yadda yadda. Argh, make it stop.<br />
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If anyone has any extra inspiration or confidence lying about, I'd be glad to take it off your hands. :)Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-23353173266646981112013-04-01T17:56:00.000-07:002013-04-01T17:56:29.565-07:00Whoa, Wait ... It's April Already?!What happened to February and March? I feel like I went to sleep the day after my last blog post and just woke up.<br />
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That's a real nice April Fool's joke on me.<br />
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Well, I guess I just didn't notice the rapid passage of time because of how busy I've been. I got called on to join a show already in rehearsal when someone dropped out. At the time I wasn't even considering auditioning for the last couple of shows of the season at VPA, but when my phone started blowing up with messages like, "Heather, come join the fun!" - well, how can anyone resist that?<br />
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I almost resisted. Having just gotten a regular schedule in teaching and coming off from a subbing stint that made me appreciate the time I had to myself, I almost said no. But when I saw who all was also in the show (and more friends have joined since I arrived), I had to change no to yes. Besides, hubby was actually encouraging me for once, since he's been taking martial arts classes in the evenings.<br />
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So with rehearsals, a heavier teaching schedule, new routines to practice, trying to keep up with Write 1 Sub 1, and much more, time got away from me. In March, I actually stopped writing again. (What is it with the month of March? I go strong for two months and then conk out at the same time every year.)<br />
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I promised myself that I would pick up the writing again in April, since our show opens this first weekend in April. I still need time to practice new exercise routines, which is hard since each routine is an hour and I have four to learn. But as each one releases this month, that load will get less and less. And this is the last week of evening rehearsals during the week. Now I'll just be busy with the show on weekends.<br />
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I found out the musicals next season are Brigadoon (the first show) and The Marvelous Wonderettes (next year.) I am very interested to see what happens at the Brigadoon auditions. For one thing, it's a big musical, so lots of people needed. For another thing, it's the first show of the season, which means rehearsals will run through the summer. In Alaska, it's hard to get people to commit to a show during the summer because everyone wants to get outside while they can. And one other thing, it will need a lot of guys. One of them at least has to be a good singer and dancer.<br />
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So, as is always my burden to bear, what part I get will rest squarely on the shoulders of what men show up to auditions. This season I was screwed out of both shows I auditioned for because the guys were too young for me to match up with. I shudder to think this may happen again. But next season is more girl-heavy, as opposed to this current season, which was more guy-heavy. So guys got spread pretty thin this year.<br />
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Alas, nothing for a poor girl to do but wait and see. And stew.<br />
<br />
All right, back to the writing thing now. I've got three flash stories I need to write this week for a submission call. That'll help make up for the stories I missed this last month. I know that's not technically in the spirit of Write 1 Sub 1, but this year I'll settle for having fifty-two stories at the end of the year, even if they weren't written one a week. That'll still be a bigger accomplishment than the previous years.Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-85868654696328343682013-01-25T12:40:00.000-08:002013-01-25T12:40:02.551-08:00The Loss of a Publisher, and the New AdditionThis month seems to hold a lot of activity. Not only am I writing regularly again, but I've been practicing routines like crazy (and waiting for my schedule to become "normal" again), and now there is a new family member in our Little House in the Big Woods!<br />
<br />
First, a moment of silence for the passing of Pill Hill Press. This publisher was the first to take a chance on my work. They took on my story, "The Oni," and published it in their anthology "Leather, Denim, and Silver: Legends of the Monster Hunter." They also took my third and my fourth stories. (Wicked East Press, one closely associated with Pill Hill Press, took the second one, if I remember the order correctly.) Last August I had submitted a story to their Psycho Cinema anthology.<br />
<br />
The answer I got back was not the one I was expecting. Pill Hill Press had decided to close down. By the time I read the email announcement, the website and the forum were already removed. Wicked East just sent an email that while the closing has affected much of their working, they intend to continue after things are straightened out, so that's good to know.<br />
<br />
I'm not sure how this will effect the anthologies for sale on Amazon, etc. Maybe someday, when I'm a world famous writer, they will become precious collector items. ;) (I dream big, though my true intentions usually aren't that grand.)<br />
<br />
But the writing continues. Today, the writing continues with a lapful of purring kitten.<br />
<br />
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<br />
Please welcome Dexter, male tortie extraordinaire!<br />
<br />
I didn't realize male tortoiseshells were so rare, though I knew male calicoes were. Something about the color pattern only passing through the female XX chromosomes, but sometimes a male is born with XXY.<br />
<br />
We'd been looking at many cats lately, through the Facebook pages of Clear Creek Cat Rescue (where we got Daisy) and Alaska Cat Adoptions Team (ACAT, who often bring cats to Petzoo for adoption days too). We were wanting a boy who was laid back, liked dogs, liked to play, and preferably young.<br />
<br />
I saw this picture on ACAT's Facebook, and the description included liking dogs and playing. When I saw that sweet face, I yelled, "That's my boy!"<br />
<br />
I immediately posted that we wanted to adopt him. When the foster mom got back to me, she said someone had laid claim first, but declined the price. Because male torties are 1 in 3,000, they were looking to get a premium adoption fee to help keep the volunteer rescue group afloat during the thin times. I said we had no problem with the fee. She had to keep him for about a week until he made weight before we could bring him home.<br />
<br />
We got to visit him at the foster mom's house. He mostly ignored us, since he was with his siblings and they were just brought to a part of the house they weren't familiar with. I thought he would mostly ignore me when he first got to our place as well.<br />
<br />
Boy, was I wrong.<br />
<br />
I took him to the bathroom since Daisy was hissing. Within fifteen minutes, he'd explored the whole room and then curled up in my lap, purring away. He stayed there a long time. Throughout the day, he spent a lot of time in my lap. All last night, he slept on my chest. He is in my lap right now as I write this.<br />
<br />
The fact that Daisy won't let him get close does not even perturb him in the slightest. The dogs do not bother him one bit. The only thing that scares him is loud noises, but he's already mellowing out over that. He does keep advancing on Daisy, clearly wanting a mama to cuddle him, but Daisy isn't ready for that yet.<br />
<br />
However, they spent about a half an hour with Daisy on my lap and Dexter smashed in against her butt on my stomach. She kept hissing at him, occasionally batting his head, but he didn't care. She wasn't using claws.<br />
<br />
I am amazed at how quickly he made himself at home here. It's like he knew right away that this was home. That he would be loved and treasured here.<br />
<br />
Anyway, so that's the latest in Our Little Cabin in the Woods. The hole has diminished somewhat, though it will never go away. Dusty and Asuka are greatly missed, and I found myself leaking a few tears over them yesterday. But I plan on giving these two, Daisy and Dexter, the best life I can, just like I did for Dusty and Asuka.<br />
<br />
And now back to writing, before I bust out crying again. :)Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-85742217599192887032013-01-13T19:38:00.002-08:002013-01-13T19:39:31.768-08:00How Much Can One Day Suck?Quite a bit, apparently.<br />
<br />
Yesterday was rather entertaining, when looking back on it the next day. One of those days I almost (almost, mind you) think about moving back to the lower forty-eight.<br />
<br />
I taught three classes yesterday, one of my heavy load days, increased by the arrangement of two practice sessions with a couple of other instructors. We have new routines being released, so we get together to practice them and get paid for the practice sessions.<br />
<br />
The fun began right at the end of my Centergy class, a class that's a fusion of yoga, pilates, and tai chi. The last track is for resting, recovery, and generally behavior usually attributed to meditation. I was just starting the speech that brings everyone back to the present moment in a gentle fashion:<br />
<br />
"Take a slow, deep breath. As you release it, begin waking up the body by wiggling fingers and -"<br />
<br />
EEEEEEEEEHHHHHHNNNNNN!<br />
<br />
The loudest, most obnoxious noise I've ever encountered rips through the entire building.<br />
<br />
Someone had set off the fire alarm.<br />
<br />
I stood there with my mouth hanging open. Then I said, "Well, you're all awake, so have a good day!" Everyone cracked up.<br />
<br />
My next class started late because the noise continued until the fire department could arrive and turn it off. It was a false alarm, reportedly set off by a bouncing basketball. Whoopsie-daisy! At least it's good to know that the alarm is so loud, it'll drive everyone out of the building, emergency or not.<br />
<br />
And now a few words about the weather.<br />
<br />
Most of the time, it snows here through December, January, February and March. Snow in November, October, and even September is not unheard of, and it often snows in April, and sometimes as late as May.<br />
<br />
In other words, snow is expected, and in many ways, appreciated. Fills potholes in the road, stuff like that. Last year we got more than we needed, but it still wasn't a huge problem. I'll take too much snow over the really huge winds we get any day.<br />
<br />
There was one year that put something ahead of my dislike for great winds: freezing rain, aka ice storms. That was the year my Yaris got stuck sideways after sliding on the ice at the top of the driveway.<br />
<br />
This season, we've only had one decent dumping of snow. This was followed by strong winds displacing the snow and packing it down hard in some places. And then the temperature shot up for a couple of weeks, melting the tops of everything just enough to form ice.<br />
<br />
Even that's not always too bad. The melting was minimal, and the fact that the wind displaced the snow helped keep a lot of roads pretty clear of ice.<br />
<br />
But yesterday, the rain started. The kind of rain that is almost slush, and therefore freezes to the top of already slick areas and makes them virtually impassible with the expectation of keeping your car on the road.<br />
<br />
I was on my way after a very long day of exercise, and the rain had been going all day. When I stopped in Walmart, I was going to park in a close spot to minimize the possibility of slipping and falling. I was driving extremely slow, and trying to give everything around me lots of room.<br />
<br />
I STILL almost slid into a parked car as I turned into a spot. Changed my mind and parked far away from other cars. All my balance training in my classes helps me stay on my feet as it is.<br />
<br />
When I turned off the main road to the one that goes to my subdivision, I knew that things were going to get really bad. It's mostly downhill, with an S-curve at the bottom, a place where moose like to hang out. So I stayed in second gear most of the way. When I was approaching the dreaded curve, I slowed down and put it in first gear until I was creeping along at about two or three miles per hour.<br />
<br />
I intended to go through the middle of the curve and minimize any turning as much as possible. There were no edges where I could get better traction, only deep ditches into the properties lining the roads. It didn't matter what gear I was in, how slow I was going, or how carefully I approached the area; this curve had it in for me. My car just slid right off the road and over into the ditch sideways.<br />
<br />
I almost thought the car was going to roll, but it didn't. I cringed at the sound of the thorny brush scraping the sides and the undercarriage. I tried driving it forward, because it looked like I could get out by the driveway a little ways ahead. But it got stuck and died a couple of times.<br />
<br />
A nice neighbor and his teenage kids stopped and offered to give me a ride home, which was right neighborly of them. Later that night, my hubby and I managed to get the car out ourselves without towing.<br />
<br />
The most amazing part: there doesn't seem to be any damage to the car at all.<br />
<br />
I love my car.<br />
<br />
So though the day was about the worst it can get in Alaska weather-wise, it still manage to end all right. And still not nearly as bad as the entirety of last year was. I've written and submitted two stories this year. I've already caught up to last year's count.<br />
<br />
This rain is about to drive me batty, though. Spring weather in the middle of January, when we're supposed to be having sub zero temps and lots of snow. And the wind started blowing today, too.<br />
<br />
In the arena of healthy eating, we've been gradually going over to a more primal based diet: veggies, meats, fruits, that kind of thing. Essentially, no grains or farm- and agriculture-related foods. We're not strict. We still have brown rice. We still have dairy. Paleo is even more strict from what I've heard, even down to no fruit because of the sugar. I doubt we'll ever get that far, thanks to my relentless sweet tooth.<br />
<br />
I was kind of missing pancakes, and I found a recipe for almond pancakes on a blog called "Girl Gone Primal." Tried them out today. If you're expecting them to be anything like the traditional wheat pancakes, you'll be disappointed. They are different. Not necessarily bad, but it's hard to describe. Drier and almost crumbly if you let them sit awhile. But decent with maple syrup. I couldn't eat very much, though. They are heavier and more filling than wheat pancakes.<br />
<br />
I plan on trying her "Oopsie Pizza" recipe next. :)Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-28740750690910215372012-12-31T20:19:00.001-08:002013-04-01T17:54:54.966-07:002012 in ReviewLooking back at blog entries and Facebook posts, I came to a grim realization:<br />
<br />
2012 sucked big time.<br />
<br />
There were a couple of high points, only one of which was really big. The big one was my husband's promotion, so much earlier than we expected it to be. The other high points: visiting my family in April (slightly marred by the TSA abuse), and selling one of my stories to the Ravaged anthology.<br />
<br />
But sitting here, I remember exactly a year ago we brought Asuka home from the vet after her leg amputation. I am still grateful for the year we got to have with her following that event, but I'd be lying if I said it didn't color the rest of the year. Everything just went downhill from there.<br />
<br />
I still ache when I think of my precious fur babies in heaven. I still have dreams about them, still go through pictures of them, still cry every once in a while. I think my strong emotions have drawn Daisy closer to me, as she seems to feel the need to protect me. She often curls up under the covers with me or stretches out along my back. I had a strange dream last night where she turned into a bird, but I didn't know it was her. She'd land on my fingers or my shoulder. Then Asuka pounced, and she turned back into a cat and hissed. Dusty sat nearby and just watched, licking his chops. I can usually interpret dreams pretty well, but I'm not sure what to think of this one.<br />
<br />
Anyway, 2013 needs to kick 2012's ass. So I am restarting Write 1 Sub 1 with every intention of surpassing my achievements in 2011. I'll be teaching a lot of classes, which will keep me busy and tired. I think 2013 will definitely go down as a year to remember, and in a much better way.<br />
<br />
The world may not have ended this month, but I think the world will change in big ways.<br />
<br />
And I want to enjoy the ride.<br />
<br />
Happy New Year! May 2013 bring you the granting of many wishes, the realization of many dreams, and the wit and presence to notice. ;) I'm going to look up some story ideas now.Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-62457581166077481472012-12-11T18:12:00.000-08:002013-01-13T19:40:08.799-08:00The Hole Engulfs the HouseThree weeks to the day after losing Dusty, last Friday Asuka followed him to the light. Her breathing had been getting heavier, and early Friday morning she had a fit where she was fighting to breathe and panicking a bit. At first we thought she was still doing okay, because she demanded breakfast, but she had another fit a couple of hours later.<br />
<br />
I told Logan how she hadn't gone upstairs on her own in several days, she was wobbly when she walked or when I set her down on her feet, and seemed to be going downhill faster. She could barely even purr anymore. We found out later that she weighed only about three pounds, so she'd lost weight she didn't have to lose. The vet would be closed until Monday, and I was scared she would have more, and worse, fits over the weekend. It seemed the line between living comfortably and suffering had been crossed. When Logan saw her having the second fit, we agreed that it was time to take her in.<br />
<br />
Both of us were looking for reasons not to, of course. After making the call, I spent the rest of the day with Asuka sleeping in my lap. My mind shrieked at me the whole time, telling me it was too soon, that maybe she would get better, that maybe a miracle was lying it wait.<br />
<br />
But I knew it wasn't. She had cancer, and it was in her lungs. Just like my grandmother, who came home to die after learning that.<br />
<br />
The visit was much like what happened with Dusty, except that the office was very busy. We sat on the exit side in two isolated chairs away from everyone else. A lady showed us into a small room we'd never been in before, and put the table down. I kept Asuka in my lap as she gave her the sedative shot. I petted her and repeated how much we loved her.<br />
<br />
The vet assistant returned with another lady. If I weren't so upset, I would have found the pair amusing, like the Two Stooges, dropping cotton balls and whatnot.<br />
<br />
I lifted Asuka up on the table and cried as she was given the final shot. We were told she might convulse, but that she wouldn't feel anything. Nothing like that happened. She merely stopped breathing. And then she was gone.<br />
<br />
They left us alone with her to say our goodbyes. I asked her to please give our love to Dusty when she saw him. We petted her, I kissed the top of her head on her little orange spot, and we hugged each other and cried. We wrapped her up in the blanket they'd given us, and quietly left.<br />
<br />
When we receive her ashes, we'll set the box up next to Dusty's on the shelf above the window. In the summer, we'll decide where we want to sprinkle them, so that they will always be together.<br />
<br />
I don't think I've ever been this seriously depressed. I am having an extreme crisis of faith. I prayed for them both, every single day of their entire lives. These two cats were the first ones I'd ever had as indoor cats, and I was always impressed how much longer indoor cats lived, even into their twenties. So why was it not to be with these two? We did everything we could to keep them healthy and happy. I feel like I failed them somehow, like I didn't try hard enough, I didn't do the right things.<br />
<br />
My conscious mind tells me how ridiculous that is, that we did more for them than most people do for their pets, that we gave them peaceful deaths with dignity. And I am grateful that we were able to give Asuka a year that she wouldn't have had with us otherwise. But I can't seem to convince myself. I feel like I will collapse under the weight of guilt.<br />
<br />
Daisy seems to be at a loss. I swear she roams around upstairs expecting the other two to pop out at her. Every once in a while, I hear her meow up there, like she's calling for them. She follows me around a lot more now. She's lying on the table next to the computer as I type this.<br />
<br />
I keep thinking I see them sitting on the stairs, or on the futon, or on the bed.<br />
<br />
I have cried every single night before going to sleep.<br />
<br />
We've decided not to adopt any other animals for now. But we are seriously considering fostering homeless animals that are rescued from shelters before they can be euthanized. One such group has adoption clinics at Petzoo every once in a while, and I asked about it. We had adopted Daisy from another such rescue group almost two years ago. That way I can help as many animals as possible without becoming the local Crazy Cat Lady.<br />
<br />
In the meantime, I'll grieve and grapple with the guilt and the pain. I have many friends doing their best to comfort me, and I am extremely grateful to them for their kind words and love.<br />
<br />
Asuka had found us in June of 2003, perching herself on the porch railing of my in-law's house and waiting patiently for us to come out and welcome her. Dusty found us a few months later the same year, announcing his arrival on the deck during feeding time with a mighty thump. They gave us nine years of love, friendship, and much purring. I suppose that they both left us in the same year is fitting, but it should have been years from now.<br />
<br />
Please hug your loved ones tonight, and tell them how much you love them.<br />
<br />
"You know, someone has said that we should live each day as if it were the last day of our lives."<br />
<br />
"Augh! This is the last day! This is it! I only have twenty-four hours left! Help me, help me! This is the last day! Auuuuuuuugh!"<br />
<br />
" ... Clearly, some philosophies aren't for all people."<br />
<br />
Got that right, Sally. Maybe I need a new philosophy too.Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-57731534593076136212012-12-01T21:41:00.002-08:002012-12-01T21:41:29.976-08:00The Hole in The House, Nanowrimo Bust, and No SnowNovember was just a bad month all around. In fact, most of this year has just been sad, what with the cats' health and not writing and gradually getting exercised to death.<br />
<br />
The worst part was that Dusty's health did not improve. He started slipping back down the health hill, getting weaker and not eating. I made an appointment for the doc to see both Dusty and Asuka and get his opinion on options.<br />
<br />
He told us the straight, bleak truth: Dusty wasn't going to get better on his own, and most of the options were not comfortable ones. Things like feeding tubes and subcutaneous fluid shots, etc. And none of it would necessarily help. He said that at some point you have to decide when you're doing it for the health and well-being of the cat, and when you're doing it for yourself. That struck a chord with both me and Logan.<br />
<br />
When he examined Asuka, he noted her breathing was a bit heavier than usual, which I had also noticed. He told us that he didn't recommend any more surgeries to remove lumps because it had likely metastasized to her lungs now anyway. He did suggest a steroid that would help her appetite and help her general health. Then he left us alone to discuss options.<br />
<br />
I told Logan that I couldn't bear the thought of putting Dusty through any more pain, but that I also could not stand the idea of bringing him home and watching him die slowly. I had watched several beloved cats die because we couldn't take them to the vet when I was growing up. Logan agreed: we were both there to love him and pet him as we said goodbye, and he could go to sleep without any pain. As for Asuka, we decided to get the steroid.<br />
<br />
When he came back, the vet gave Dusty a sedative. He fell asleep in Logan's lap. A little while later, the vet returned with an assistant to give him the final shot. He said that Dusty was gone so fast, he was probably on the way out with the sedative. We knew that he must have been a very sick kitty indeed.<br />
<br />
They left so we could say our goodbyes. Then the assistant returned to make a print from his paw to craft an ornament with his name and paw print on it. We decided to have him cremated, since the ground is frozen, and we wouldn't be able to bury him sufficiently with our shallow ground. That way, we could keep his ashes until the time Asuka passes, so we can release their ashes somewhere together, maybe on one of our favorite hikes.<br />
<br />
I am extremely grateful to our vet for being straightforward with us, instead of leading us on with promises that make money but don't help. He truly cares about animals and wants them to be happy as much as we do.<br />
<br />
Asuka is doing well on the steroid. She's eating like crazy and still seems pretty healthy despite the huge lumps and the breathing. She's even demanding people food, like meat and cheese, which she never had before. She sits by my side and I feed her little bits of meat from my stew as I'm eating. At this point, she can eat whatever she wants. I still give her the Life Gold on her evening food. She's sleeping in my lap as I type this, purring.<br />
<br />
There's a hole in the house without Dusty here. It feels so wrong. I keep glancing up, expecting to see him sitting at the top of the stairs. Without him as a buffer, Daisy and Asuka have not been getting along so well. But I know Dusty's in a better place, healthy and fluffy. The gold tin with his ashes sits above the window with his Stuffed Dusty toy and the paw print ornament. I have no idea how much longer Asuka will be with us, but I intend to keep her as happy as I can for as long as I can.<br />
<br />
This all pretty much spelled disaster for Nanowrimo. I attended one writing meeting, and wrote a little over one thousand words. Then I never even so much as glanced at the website or tried to write another word. I felt sucked dry of imagination, inspiration, and drive.<br />
<br />
Part of that is also due to the fact that I'm working my butt off at the club. We lost three instructors over the summer, and two more with pregnancies. One of those instructors is back, but the other instructor carrying the club with me is going on vacation this month. I'll be teaching fourteen hours a week until middle of January, fifteen hours a week a couple of those weeks. And that's only if no one else asks me to sub for them.<br />
<br />
I'm happy to be able to help people out, but I tell you what, I'm tired. This is my last two-day weekend for a while, and I'll probably spend it sleeping.<br />
<br />
To top it all off, there's no snow here! We got two brief little spits, but the wind blew it all away almost immediately. The winds have been awful, this current blast being the worst of all. Once, when climbing into the car in a store parking lot, I couldn't close my door. I pulled with all my strength, with both hands, and with one foot braced. I guess the gusts have been up to eighty-five miles an hour in some places. It sure feels like it. I hope we have it before Christmas rolls around. I even prefer the below zero temps to this wind. At least that gave us some beautiful frost.<br />
<br />
So, generally depressing. But I'm trying to find some bright spots. We still have Asuka, and she still seems to be enjoying life. Daisy, Bruno, and Uffda all seem happy. I talked to some people with Alaska Cat Adoption about the possibility of fostering in the future. Logan got a promotion to a position he was hoping to get. And all this exercising keeps me looking hot. :)<br />
<br />
Since 2012 was almost nil in writing production (I did sell one erotic story, and I'm still waiting to hear on another horror story), I plan on restarting my commitment to Write 1 Sub 1 for 2013. I hope to make it a better year than 2011 was for my writing.<br />
<br />
That is, as long as the world doesn't end on December 21st. ;)Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-4493591051335529292012-10-24T15:13:00.000-07:002012-10-24T15:13:45.862-07:00Bad Blogger! No Doughnut!Um, so I guess it has been approximately three months since my last blog post? Boy, am I rotten at this whole writing thing.<br />
<br />
Well, things have been rather screwy, what with changes in my husband's job, practicing new routines, and trying to complete a costume in time for a Halloween karaoke party this weekend. Which isn't done yet.<br />
<br />
The biggest thing that has happened concerns my cats. My Tripawed Wonder seems to be doing okay, except that her lump has returned with reinforcements. They don't seem to be bothering her at this time, but I continue giving her the ES Clear drops since she appears so healthy otherwise. ES Clear has been improved and renamed to Life Gold now. Doesn't need to be refrigerated, which is nice, since Asuka hates cold stuff.<br />
<br />
I can't take her to the vet now because a week ago, Dusty ended up staying at the vet for four days due to renal failure. Unfortunately, what caused it can't really be determined right now. The biggest signal was that he stopped eating, stopped using the litter box, and drank water like crazy. Then his coat got dull and saggy, his eyes sunken and weepy, and he got extremely lethargic, though restless.<br />
<br />
He started eating shortly after getting fluids. When I went to visit him, he had his face in his food bowl. Everyone that worked there loved him, said he was so friendly.<br />
<br />
Now back at home, he's on canned K/D. The other two are also on a canned food diet now. I've read all the information on how it can be better for cats' health, and I went with my vet's recommendation on food that wouldn't be bad for him if Dusty got hold of some of it.<br />
<br />
Dusty is also on a medication, the name of which escapes me at the moment. He gets it every three and a half days, and there's even a choice of flavors. He's not fond of it being forced on him, but he doesn't seem to mind the taste of it either.<br />
<br />
He's thriving, though he's not quite back to his normal self. He's more mellow now, as though tired easily. But something interesting happened in the house while he was gone:<br />
<br />
Daisy started coming upstairs.<br />
<br />
In the year and a half since we adopted her, she has stayed downstairs while Dusty and Asuka ruled the upstairs. I guess since Asuka didn't pitch a fit when she came up to investigate, and Dusty wasn't there to protest, she has decided it's safe enough now. Daisy loves sleeping under the covers in our bed. And playing with the ear plugs I wear when hubby snores. I'll have to clean things up now since she plays with everything. And I do mean EVERYTHING.<br />
<br />
That's all I can think of to post at the moment. I'll try to be more regular with this whole writing thing. Especially since next month is Nanowrimo. :)Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-15379289100556538662012-08-01T13:34:00.003-07:002012-08-01T13:38:21.884-07:00Ravaged Blog Hop!One of the things I love about writing is that it's introducing me to concepts that I've never experienced before. This is my first time participating in a "blog hop," where several writers are hosting interviews with other writers on their blogs.<br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #a64d79;">Ravaged Blog Hop - 5 blogs, 10 authors, 10 copies to be won!<br /><br />Welcome to the Ravaged Author Blog Hop<br /><br />To celebrate the release of Ravaged this weekend, the authors have done a little Q&A hosted by five of the authors on their blogs. Starting Friday, August 3rd through Monday, August 6th, take a journey to see what brought the stories of this phantasmagorical anthology to light.<br /><br />Each blog features two interviews, and if you comment you have a chance to win one of 10 PDF copies of Ravaged kindly donated by all the authors.<br /><br />The blog links can be found below so please go and check out all the interviews.<br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #a64d79;"><a href="http://annabethleong.blogspot.co.uk/">Annabeth Leong</a><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #a64d79;"><a href="http://dfkrieger.blogspot.co.uk/">D.F. Krieger</a></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #a64d79;"><a href="http://silviaviolet.com/blog/">Silvia Violet</a></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #a64d79;"><a href="http://sjthomaswpr.weebly.com/blog.html">SJ Thomas</a></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #a64d79;"><a href="http://www.erinoriordan.blogspot.co.uk/?zx=8c57de73a5f044cc">Erin O'Riordan</a></span><br />
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I hope you enjoy these interviews as much as I enjoyed being a part of them. Thanks for reading!</div>
</div>Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-26723732075309192652012-07-28T20:41:00.000-07:002012-07-28T20:41:38.998-07:00So what's going on with me now?As usual, I just realized I hadn't posted anything in a little more than a month. That's because my writing habits have gone completely out the window.<br />
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I realize it's a lot like exercise. Exercise is so much a part of me now that even if I quit my teaching job, I'd probably still feel the need to exercise just as often. However, if I were to stop for a period of time, say for vacation, I know how hard it would be to get going again. Even harder for someone who hasn't done a lot of exercising to begin with.<br />
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As far as writing is concerned, I'm a beginner. It hasn't become habit for me, like exercise has.<br />
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I'm in the middle of two stories at this time. And my "Encantado" story will soon be released as part of the Ravaged Anthology from Breathless Press. I got a check in the mail that reflected the royalties from an anthology published last year.<br />
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I think that was the kick in the pants I needed to plant these pants back in the chair. At least I have a more comfortable chair to sit in now than I did before.<br />
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I'm also considering maybe I need a change of venue. As in, different places to write, rather than this same desk over and over, day in and day out. Thinking of maybe getting addicted to coffee and hanging out in coffee houses.<br />
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Except I hate coffee. I guess it will have to be coco and smoothies.<br />
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I just have a hard time motivating myself to leave the house these days. When I do, it's to go teach. I love the formats that I teach, and I love the fantastic body I get from teaching all these classes. And the club has been updating the equipment, making the actual teaching more enjoyable.<br />
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I'm just so tired. July is the hardest month because I'm learning four new routines, teaching all my own classes, and subbing for a lot of instructors who go on vacation during the summer. At least now all the new releases are done, so I can stop practicing for a month. Sigh.<br />
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All that movement means that when I get home, all I want to do is space out in front of the TV, or play a video game that doesn't really involve a lot of thinking. When I sit down to write, I end up staring out the window for fifteen minutes instead, because I can't string any coherent thoughts together.<br />
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But this month is almost over. I knew back in May that this was going to be a hard one, and it was.<br />
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I just have to remind myself of this in January when everything is dead and boring.Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9182111135503486172.post-6035109443280324772012-06-13T01:26:00.000-07:002012-07-28T20:26:06.192-07:00Tripawed Adventures: Six months later ...I haven't posted on my little tripawed kitty's recovery and adjustment because she'd been doing so well, there was nothing really to say. She's almost completely the same as she used to be, with the exception of the fact that she can no longer move stealthily like cats do. She sounds more like an elephant wearing snowshoes. I can usually hear her from anywhere in the house.<br />
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For a while, I even stopped giving her the ES Clear. This was because she doesn't eat much canned food, and I can't put it on the dry, since she eats so randomly. Also, the other two fat cats mob me whenever they hear the refrigerator open because they know it means good stuff is coming out. It's hard to separate Asuka enough so that she will actually eat the food with the drops on it. And she does NOT tolerate having the drops put in her mouth with the dropper.<br />
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Everything was going well. She was healthy and happy.<br />
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Until I discovered a new lump where her shoulder used to be.<br />
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As with the last time, this tumor didn't seem to bother her any. Nor did her health seem off in any way. But knowing what we know now, I decided to take her to the vet to see what he thought.<br />
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He told me honestly that if it were his cat, he'd do the surgery to remove the tumor. She's healthy, and removing the tumor could help her stay that way. Since he had a week off, he told me to take the time to think about it.<br />
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The tumor had popped up pretty quickly. I check her almost every day. I thought to myself, if there's a possibility that this is her last year with us, I want to do whatever I can to make her happy. I told my husband that I wish animals could tell us what they want.<br />
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That night, hubby had a dream that Asuka was talking. All he could remember was that she said she wanted to have fun.<br />
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So I dug out her old collar, put it on her, and let her go outside.<br />
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She's always trying to get outside once the weather warms up. She yowls at the door, begging for the chance. So I figured I'd let her do that on the days that I don't go anywhere, so I could be there to let her back in the moment she wants to. (The collar is to let the neighbors know that she has a home.)<br />
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I also started her back on the ES Clear. If there's a possibility this could improve her situation to the point that the tumors don't come back, I'm willing to put up with the hassle. At least she seems interested in the canned food now, though I can't usually get her to eat it more than once a day.<br />
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So today she went back to the vet to have the lump removed.<br />
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She's got a row of staples running along her neck and shoulder area. The vet said he got as much of it as he could, and also removed a couple of much smaller tumors in her neck. He took very little muscle tissue in the process. He seemed very satisfied about the results.<br />
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The funniest part is that last time we brought her home, I thought she'd want to be downstairs by the fire, since it was December. She proved me wrong by running upstairs and hiding. So I thought this time I'd take her upstairs so she could hide. Ten minutes later, she came down the stairs (very wobbly and slowly) to sit by the heater.<br />
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She's a very contrary kitty. I don't even try to predict anything with her anymore. :)<br />
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Tonight I brought home a can of tuna to see if she'd be interested in it. After sitting by the heat for a while earlier in the evening, she threw up a couple of times and seemed way out of it still, so I took her back upstairs and blocked the stairs with the ironing board. I offered her the tuna water with some flakes of tuna floating in it.<br />
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Once again, tuna water saves my sanity. She drank most of it and nibbled some tuna as well.<br />
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And just a few minutes ago, as I sat here at the computer, she suddenly hopped into my lap, scaring the beejeezus out of me. I didn't even hear her coming this time!<br />
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For all that she's acting drunk as a skunk, she still seems very healthy. She's behaving just like herself, albeit a more wobbly version. I have the feeling she's going to be sleeping on top of me tonight.<br />
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And that makes me a very happy girl.Sparklecathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04453347435616848629noreply@blogger.com0